I can hardly keep from laughing when I think about the big brown counter in front of the office. From where I'm sitting I can imagine it looks like a rising flood of water while Mr. Graves and the secretaries keep on acting on as usual.
It's louder now because a lady with her baby came in to talk, blah, blah, blah. It seems longer but I've only been here about 10 minutes. I could fully involve myself in the kids and adults just walking down the hall. There are millions it seems! Here comes those darling kindergartners, carrying their papers and waiting for their bus. They're really cute walking around aimlessly, eyes wide open, drinking in their huge (it seems to them) school.
Well now I've been here 15 minutes. I just went to the bathroom on a spurt of curage. I love doing things like that. I count to 3 real fast and then go! If I count higher than three or wait and think things over, I usually don't go because I tell myself all sorts of terrible things that will happen. Oh great! 20 minutes! About 7 more and someone should come and get me. I better study my drugs now. As I picked up my drug paper I sw my power Pioneers of Tomorrow. It gave me a very warm feeling because it reminded me of the picture Jeff Naylor gave me. He read my poem thinking I meant pioneers like in the old west. He drew a picture of the people in ragged clothes standing in front of a sod house with a chicken coop. It was very good. He said it just took a minute. What do you know! An artist and a writer. Whoops! He probably doesn't even like me but I can't overlook the fact that he asked me for a copy of my poem. Oh no! If someone doesn't come down quick I going to be here're all day! Besides, I hungry.
Panic. I looked at my drug test. I missed 6 on the first one and 5 on the other one. I shouldn't have missed six on the first one because I only misspelled a name.
Oh my gosh, it's 3 til 12. If Betsy and/or Kay don't remember me! They didn't. I had to go back to the room by myself. They didn't come. Well that's how they are. I don't want to admit this to myself but I guess I have to. Besty, Kay, and Jane, my friends are kind of mean to me sometimes. Like when Carol said to me: You better put an undershirt or something under your shirt, I can see thru it. Then when I was about to tell Besty what Carol had said she asked me, Did she say you needed a bra? Well, you do. I DO NOT! All they can think of is bras and hair on mens chests and periods. And what made me want to scream was when Jill was telling them a joke and when I came over to them and asked them what it was they told me I was too much of a prig to be told. Jill told me anyway.
My love for him grows stronger every day. Oh dear I wish I could truthfully say that to myself about Jeff Naylor. But I can't because I only like him. I really love the dreams of him more than really himself. I DO hope he likes me. I wish I was too people, 1 who would never grow any older than 3 and be a darling daddy's Baby. The other one who could grow up be a 12 year old then 13 year old, then 14 and so on. Right now I have to be 12 at school at 6 at home. So I'm about as mature at a 8 year old. What's sex? I only know about 4 cuss words and I never say them. Jeff! Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff Jeff! He's the most popular boy in the sixth grade and I, the (almost) most unpopular girl in sixth grade has to (almost) fall in love with him. No I'm not in love with him, I'm in love with this image.
I could just about kill Betsy! She just about popped my bubble of happiness around Jeff. We were standing in line and Jeff popped Betsy's bra strap. She said Ow! and I turned around and asked her what happened. She told me and added (the hole line must have heard) "Cindy doesn't wear a bra." Jeff laughed. Arrrgh! I'm think I'm going to kill her! I need more paper. BOY AM I MAD! I was really, really mad at all the people in 3rd group in the spelling game we were playing. They cheated and got 50 points while we got 8! 8! No one but us got less than 38. I whish everyone didn't cheat so much in school. But if you don't everyone will think you're a goodie-goodie. Boy I hate that word!
There's one thing I scared about next year is making an impression. I'll see alot of my old friends next year in school but not all of them. Jeff (oh Jeff), Carol, Kurt (I think) and Julie are leaving to name just a few.
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